Through correspondence, Carol was able to learn more about her son Mark’s cornea recipients.

When someone loses a loved one, it’s difficult to find the good in such a heartbreaking situation. However, for many families, eye, organ and tissue donation has given them a sense of hope. And when those families hear from their loved one’s recipients, it’s particularly rewarding.

In 2010, Carol lost her 30-year-old son, Mark. Unbeknownst to the family, Mark had made the pledge to become an eye donor through Missouri’s first-person consent registry – a move that didn’t surprise Carol.

“Mark was absolutely the most loving person that we know in our family,” she said. “He cared very much about his family – about everybody. He didn’t know a stranger. Mark was never judgmental, gave everybody a fair chance, and always tried to help the underdog.”

As Carol and her family moved through the grieving process, they received a letter from Heartland Lions Eye Banks informing them Mark’s corneas had been provided to two recipients in California. Carol wrote the recipients, introducing them to her son, and soon received letters back from both individuals. One recipient in particular struck a chord with Carol, and the two began corresponding frequently.

Explained Carol, “I can’t say enough about how his words have helped me. This man just amazes me. Even in his last letter, he said, ‘Mark and I had our stitches removed and the good doctor says our vision continues to improve. We are a good fit. There was a moment or two I did feel Mark was there.’ He couldn’t have said anything better to me.”

The recipient/donor family correspondence has not only helped in the healing process for Mark’s direct family, but for his church family as well. Carol has read letters from Mark’s cornea recipient to fellow church members, helping them to find hope desperate situations and encouraging them to follow Mark’s lead by pledging to become eye and organ donors through Missouri’s donor registry.

For Carol, the Eye Bank’s correspondence program has made a difference for her family, and therefore, she urges donor families and recipients alike to consider writing their own letters.

“I know Mark is living through this gentleman. I feel he has Mark in the palm of his hand like another grandpa, and it gives me such a comforting feeling. This man was so generous in his thoughts and words back to my family.

To learn more about writing your donor family or your loved one’s recipient, please read our Connect With Us page or contact the Eye Bank at 800-753-2265.

Evelyn’s dedication to others inspired her pledge to become an eye donor.

When Evelyn of Missouri passed away from a heart attack, her family had no idea she had pledged to become an eye donor through the state’s donor registry.

Said her daughter, Deanna, “Mom had just gotten her driver’s license renewed a few months before her passing. On her license she had check-marked the box that she wanted to be a cornea donor. This was a surprise to all of us. Giving Mom’s corneas was still a very hard decision for Dad.”

Because Missouri became a first-person consent state in 2008, the decision to donate rests solely on the donor instead of the family. While her husband had trouble comprehending her decision initially, he and their children were inspired by her pledge, and they too made the choice to donate.

“It was something we talked about after her passing,” remarked Deanna. “Since donation was something that was important to her, we all made the decision we would check the box as well.”

While Evelyn’s decision was an initial surprise, her reasoning behind it wasn’t. Evelyn, a mother to four and a grandmother to nine, had long put others’ needs before her own whether it was volunteering at her church or writing letters to seniors living in nursing homes. According to Deanna, “Mom and Dad lived in a small community and knew people that needed help. If someone was in need, they were right there to provide assistance.”

Evelyn’s help didn’t end in Southwest Missouri. She and her sister both volunteered for and offered financial assistance to Asian Women & Children (AWC), a missionary in Thailand which provides support to women and a home for up to 50 orphaned girls each year. In lieu of flowers at Evelyn’s funeral, close to $3,000 was donated to AWC in her honor.

Since her passing, Evelyn continues to help others because of her pledge. Through her gift of sight, two individuals – a gentleman in Missouri and an individual in El Salvador – have been able to escape a lifetime of blindness.

To learn more about Missouri’s first-person consent registry or to pledge to donate, please visit www.donatelifemissouri.com.

A talented musician, Max created drum cadences that continue to be performed by his high school band,

When 18-year-old Max passed away following an auto accident, the world lost a talented young man. Yet, Max’s legacy lives on – both through his incredible music and his gift of sight.

As a high school student in Kansas, Max discovered a passion for music. He was the captain of his school’s drum line and played percussion in two church praise bands, so it was no surprise when the talented teen received a college scholarship to study music education.

While his talent defined much of who he was, it was his caring spirit that truly impacted those around him. Said his mother, Pam, “One year he found out that a disabled kid in his youth group wouldn’t be able to go to camp if he didn’t have someone along to help him, and Max dropped everything and volunteered so that kid wouldn’t miss out on camp. He didn’t let me tell anyone about that while he was alive – that was typical Max.”

After his death, Max’s high school classmates chose to honor his memory through his music. Throughout the 2010 football season, the marching band performed one of Max’s arrangements at every home game during which the drum line played his cadence while the rest of the band got down on one knee. “It made me cry every time,” Pam shared.

In addition, a memorial in Max’s name raised funds to purchase a marimba, a large percussion instrument, for his former high school. For years, the nine high schools in his school district have passed one marimba back and forth. Now his alma mater has its own instrument for performances.

A Gift that Lives on

When Max lost his life, his parents had to make the agonizing decision whether or not to donate his eyes, organs and tissues. Although they had never previously discussed donation with their son, his parents chose to donate his corneas to help others regain their sight. It was only after the decision was made did his parents learn that Max had indeed signed his driver’s license to be a donor.

For Pam, knowing Max continues to help others through donation has been a light during the grieving process. “Through discussion boards for parents who’ve lost children, I’ve seen so many parents who regret not making the choice to donate. But at the time, you think of your child as a person who still needs things like eyes and organs. I felt if we were going to lose him anyway, I wanted something good to come out of it.”

Because of Max’s gift, two individuals – one in Missouri and one in California – underwent corneal transplants to restore their vision. Like the hundreds of people he touched in his 18 years, these gentlemen’s lives are better because of Max.

Remarked Pam, “I pray that the people who received the gift of his eyes will be blessed by knowing that Max saw life through those eyes, and more importantly, we saw that deep, sweet soul that belonged to Max through them.”

Nolan never thought he could be an eye donor, but his gift helped another man see.

Nolan understood the challenges of blindness and the miracle of organ donation. For 11 years, his mother, who lost her eyesight to glaucoma, lived with Nolan and his wife, Wanda. He also had a cousin whose life was saved thanks to a liver transplant.

When Nolan passed away in 2009, Wanda and their children made the decision to donate his eyes for corneal transplantation through Saving Sight. Remarked Wanda, “We had talked about organ donation, but he didn’t think he could donate because he had different things wrong with him. When we learned he could donate his eyes, it was a blessing. I thought about the eye problems his mother had, and knew he could help someone else out with his gift.”

Though he left this world too early, Nolan had lived a full life in Missouri. After serving in the army as a paratrooper, he went on to work as a door-to-door milkman, manager of a gas company, and eventually owner of his own heating and cooling business. He enjoyed fishing, hunting and woodworking, and held the years, from Sunday school superintendent to song leader to deacon. Nolan was also a talented musician, playing in several bands, including one with his two children.

Nolan was especially known for his wonderful sense of humor. “We never went without laughter in our home,” said Wanda. “He had a big booming laugh that you could hear from the front door to the back of the house. He found humor in almost every aspect of life, and people really enjoyed being with him because of it. He genuinely cared for others, and they knew that.”

A few months after his passing, Wanda was introduced to Nolan’s recipient through a heartfelt thank you letter. The family received the letter at Christmastime, telling them of the recipient’s transplant journey and touching the family in a way they couldn’t have imagined.

“Nolan was a great blessing to the recipient’s life. This man was so thankful. He is only 52 with lots of time to be able to do something good in the world, so it helps a lot that he can see.”

Because of Wanda’s donation experience, she encourages others to register as eye, organ and tissue donors in Missouri and has made the pledge herself to give the gift of sight. “I told my kids, because I gave Nolan’s eyes, you have to give my eyes too. I can’t hold mine back. Donation makes such a difference in someone’s life.”

Gordon gave the gift of sight to two individuals through the miracle of corneal transplantation.

Like many individuals, Gordon registered to become an eye, organ and tissue donor, but as he got older, he wondered if age and health issues would prevent him from fulfilling his pledge.

However, when he passed away in November 2009, Gordon gave the gift of sight to two individuals through the miracle of corneal transplantation.

Said his wife of 32 years, Mary Jane, “Gordon would joke with us saying, ‘when something happens to me, my parts wouldn’t be of use to anyone.’ When we found out he could be an eye donor, it was such a blessing for our family. It is wonderful to know that my husband and my children’s father lives on through two other people.”

A father to four, grandfather to three and great-grandfather to two, Gordon spent his life helping others. He served in the Vietnam War as a helicopter crew chief before returning to Illinois to work as both a truck driver and a correctional officer. After he retired, Gordon didn’t slow down – he began serving his community as the Mayor of the Village of Harvel, Ill. In his spare time, according to Mary Jane, he enjoyed motorcycle riding, woodworking and gardening.

A few months after Gordon’s death, Mary Jane received a letter from Heartland Lions Eye Banks, sharing the news that his corneas had helped two recipients escape a world of blindness. Mary Jane had long been on the fence about becoming a donor herself, but once she received the stories of her husband’s recipients, she – and her children – made the decision to join Illinois’ donor registry themselves.

“I told my kids their dad helped me make up my mind. Donation is so important. I want to donate anything I can to whoever is in need. Because of Gordon, there is no question in me any longer.”